I was sitting staring out of the bus window, because I live in a place where public transport is easier than owning a car (so not LA.) The scenery was passing by and my mind was blank. And then it came…. The voice of God.
It was moderately surprising.
But, as it was not the first time that happened to me, it was less surprising that it could have been. Of course when I say ‘the voice of God’ I don’t mean a big booming declaration accompanied by choirs of angels. (And clearly an actual audible message would have sent me checking into the nearest outpatient clinic.) I mean a deep intuition, a fundamental knowledge bubbling up from my soul to my conscious mind.
I felt it come up, rising like a shining from the watery depths. As it bubbled up, I felt it become solid, as my mind clothed this precious truth in words. And so it came –
“Cat, cut the cr*p.”
Now, that was surprising.
I don’t use profanity in my regular life. Neither do my friends. In my books, the characters only swear when I feel that there was nothing else they could have possibly said. In fact, no one has spoken to me like that since I left high school and overhauled my life to let God in.
I sat for a minute and tried to work out why my mind would have delivered the Divine command in the voice of my high school best friend. High school BFF had many wonderful qualities, (like an unprecedented capacity to get nightclub bouncers to ‘forget’ to check our ID.) The most significant was her capacity to get me to see sense when all else failed (like right before I bleached my hair.) If God was talking to me in her voice then there was something I seriously needed to do.
I waited to see if anything else floated through my mind. Surely God wouldn’t leave me knowing I had to get over myself and go do something without telling me what.
I saw myself watching YouTube.
“God? You want me to pay more attention to YouTube?”
I could almost feel God giving me that face I give my kids when they say they want candy as the side dish at dinner. Nice try, but let’s do that again.
I saw myself watching Glennon Doyle Melton on the Oprah channel saying that wise women ‘show up before they’re ready.’ They don’t think, I’ll write that book when I get my house organized, or take that dance class after I’ve lost 20 pounds. They just see what they have to do in life and go do it, or it will never get done.
When I watched the clip on YouTube, I remember thinking ‘like that blog I keep wanting to write about living and writing with God. The one I’m waiting until my books are international best-sellers before I start.’
God didn’t need to say anything else. I got the message.
I hung my head in submission, “Yes, Lord. I’ll start the blog today. And next time, I’ll try to listen the first twenty times You tell me something, so that no one has to resort to swearing.”
Welcome to my new blog, writingtheword.com. It’s about me trying to make my way into heaven; writing, living and hoping I’m listening.